If I had a dollar for every time I’ve been asked this question, I’d be writing this from a beach in Greece with a cold drink in hand.
“When will my baby sleep through the night?“
It’s the holy grail of early parenthood. I get it. You’re exhausted, your baby is adorable but confusing, and no one on the internet seems to agree on anything. So let’s clear some things up and get really honest about what “sleeping through the night” actually means.
First, no one really sleeps through the night.
Let’s bust the myth right out of the gate: even adults don’t sleep straight through the night. We all wake up (or at the very least come to the surface of sleep) multiple times — shifting positions, checking the clock, adjusting the blanket. We just don’t remember most of it, because we know how to get ourselves back to sleep.
Babies do the same thing. They move through sleep cycles every 30-45 minutes, and between those cycles, they briefly wake up. Sometimes they drift right into the next one. Sometimes… they don’t.
So when a parent says, “My baby sleeps through the night,” what they really mean is, “My baby can connect sleep cycles on their own without my help.”
That’s the key difference. It’s not about never waking up — it’s about not needing anything from you when they do.
So when will that happen?
Here’s the honest answer: When they learn how.
Falling asleep (and falling back asleep) is a learned skill, not a milestone that magically clicks at 6 or 12 months. Yes, some babies are total unicorns and figure it out early and without a ton of intervention (kind of like the kid who sits down at a piano and starts playing by ear). But for most babies, it takes practice, opportunity, and a little guidance to get there.
If your baby always needs to be bounced, fed, rocked, or rescued in order to sleep, neither of you are doing anything wrong — but they are learning that this is how sleep works. Over time, they’ll come to expect those same things every time they’re tired. And while that works (until it doesn’t), it’s also why sleep often doesn’t magically get easier. It stays something you have to do for them instead of something they know how to do themselves. Kind of like sitting at the piano with them on your lap, but never letting them try the keys on their own.
But isn’t sleep developmental?
Yes… and no.
There are developmental factors that impact sleep: a newborn’s tiny tummy, a 6-month-old’s growing mobility, a toddler’s wild imagination. Some things are biologically appropriate and expected. But the skill of connecting sleep cycles is something we can teach and support — in a developmentally appropriate way — from the very beginning.
Sleep training isn’t just about waiting for the right age. It’s about:
- A solid, predictable routine
- An age-appropriate schedule
- An environment that supports sleep
- And most importantly, giving your child the opportunity to practice falling asleep on their own
You don’t have to wait for some magical milestone. You can guide them toward better sleep in a way that feels supportive, sustainable, and respectful of your values whenever YOU’RE ready.
So what do I do if I’m ready for sleep now?
If you’re wondering when your baby will start sleeping through the night, here’s the real question to ask: Is what we’re doing now setting them up to sleep well on their own?
If the answer is no (or you’re not sure) it might be time to make some changes. That doesn’t mean doing anything you’re wholly uncomfortable with. But it may mean being willing to shift out of patterns that aren’t working and give your child the space and support to learn something new.
Because the truth is, sleep can get so much better — for both of you — with the right plan in place.
If sleep still feels like a giant question mark and you’re stuck cycling through strategies that sort of work (until they don’t), it might be time for a new approach.
At Oh Baby Consulting, I work with families to build personalized sleep plans that actually make sense for your baby’s age, your goals, and your parenting style. No rigid scripts. No guessing games. Just clear support and a plan you can stick with.
You don’t have to do this alone.
